"If we don't stand for something we will fall for anything."
From the Allegro Ballroom, California, Last Century: Still true?
Lead and Follow:
The follower's hand is held lightly by the leader. Neither dancer should clutch the other's hand and hang on. Nor should they press downward with the hand. While pressure through the hands aids the dancers, a tight grip by either dancer inhibits turns and other open moves. Downward pressure on the hand is uncomfortable at best and can strain the shoulder of the "pressee" at worst.
"Peggy Sue" by Buddy Holly
Self-consciousness may be fine for other social transactions, but when dancers over accommodate each other, they will alternately drift apart and then collide, precisely the result they are trying to avoid. The leader must take both arms with his body everywhere he goes and the follower must stay in the leader's right arm in order to fully "feel" the lead.
Pub's Side Note: Fortunately, I am meeting more people that have good speakers on their computers. With some good speakers you can play music that may sound better than your high class stereos. Or a good set of Earphones. I can give them some of my music.